and heartbreaking as this journey has been, I would not have
gone through it any other way. I cannot imagine the regrets
I would have been burdened with if we had decided to
terminate when we were told of Angel's condition. Angel is a
blessing; she has brought so much love and precious memories
to our family."
Angel's Ultrasound Video In Memory of Angel
This is a compilation of our beloved Angel's ultrasound video
and just a few of her pictures. In her ultrasound video, you'll
see Angel smiling, playing with her foot, puckering her lips to
blow you Angel kisses, sucking her thumb and stretching. This
video is so dear to our hearts because it is the only tangible
memory we have of Angel when she was full of LIFE.
Here's a poem shared by a dear friend, who is a NICU
"These are my footprints,
so perfect and so small.
These tiny footprints
never touched the ground at all.
Not one tiny footprint,
for now I have wings.
These tiny footprints were meant
for other things.
You will hear my tiny footprints,
in the patter of the rain.
Gentle drops like angel's tears,
of joy and not from pain.
You will see my tiny footprints,
in each butterflies' lazy dance.
I'll let you know I'm with you
if you just give me the chance.
You will see my tiny footprints,
in the rustle of the leaves.
I will whisper names into the wind,
and call each one that grieves.
Most of all, these tiny footprints,
are found on Mommy and Daddy's hearts.
'Cause even though I'm gone now,
We'll never truly part." - Unknown
I found the following poem online:
Our little Angel, we love you so.
We wish you wouldn't have had to go.
We got to hold you...touch your tiny hands and face.
How our hearts long for one last embrace.
Our time together was short, but the pain runs deep.
You looked so peaceful in our arms...
As if you were asleep.
Mommy and Daddy love you,
We would love to have you back.
But with God you must stay,
Until we are joined together at last.
Goodbye, for now, our Angel...until we meet again.
We love you and we miss you.
Slowly...our hearts will mend.
By: Jodi Anderson
November 30th, 2009 should have been Angel's day according to our plan.
We should have been surrounded by other family members during my
labor and delivery according to our plan. If everything went
according to our plan, we could have had a healthy baby girl with us
at home. But, we are not always granted our ways in God's plan. We
followed our Faith and left everything in God's hands.
Our little Angel is in heaven now. Angel passed away in utero and I
delivered her on November 14th at 3:18 AM. She weighed 4 lbs, 6.5
oz, and was 17.5 in long. We spent 17 unforgettable hours with her.
I admit I was apprehensive to see her with the uncertainties of
exactly how she has developed, but Angel was more beautiful than I
had ever imagined. She had Daddy's full head of hair with two
swirlies, light skin, and shapely legs, while she had my long
fingers and feet. We couldn't help but marvel that her ears were
exactly like her big sister's ears; her right ear was Daddy's and
her left ear was Mommy's. She only had an extra finger on her left
hand. Angel's big brother and sisters expressed their unconditional
love, each having multiple opportunities to hold her and shower her
Jeanne Luna from Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep captured many precious
moments that we will treasure always, such as Angel's baptismal. Amy
Beyer, the hospital Social Worker, was there to support us and also
captured many precious memories of Angel, such as 3D moldings of her
hands and feet.
It was so difficult to give her up, although I kept telling myself
that her body was just a vessel and she was happy in heaven already.
We held a beautiful funeral service on November 21st. I couldn't
have asked for a more perfect day.
Through tears of joy and sadness, the first week after our little
Angel's passing went too fast. It now seems like a distant memory
when she was inside me, growing, thriving, giving me loving nudges,
squirms, and tickles. I'm desperately trying to hold on to every
precious moment I had with her. I hope to capture all the moments
here and in a journal I started, as well as provide hope, faith and
love to others who find themselves in this journey. As difficult and
heartbreaking as this journey has been, I would not have gone
through it any other way. I cannot imagine the regrets I would have
been burdened with if we had decided to terminate when we were told
of Angel's condition. Angel is a blessing; she has brought so much
love and precious memories to our family.
I miss her so much! I would give and do anything to be able to hold
her again. It is especially difficult with the holidays. I just
remind myself that although she is no longer with us, Angel is
blessed to be in the company of many heavenly friends and family
members, and she will live in our hearts forever.
I will try to find a way to include Angel's ultrasound video. In the
meantime, here are some pictures taken from the video. As you can
see, Angel was very much alive and a real person playing with her
foot, pursing her lips, and smiling.
Thank you for all of your continuing support, thoughts and prayers.
You will always be in our prayers.
With Much Love,
"Some people only dream of angels; we held one in our arms."
Hello. My name is Jane. My husband, Frank, and I have three
children, Keoni (14 years old), Chloe (11 years old), and Tasi (4
years old). We are currently stationed at Fort Sam Houston, TX. I am
currently 32 weeks pregnant and my due date is December 1, 2009.
20 weeks during the normally scheduled ultrasound, my husband and I
received the unexpected and heartbreaking news that no parent ever
wants to hear, which are signs of abnormalities and that they are
possibly fatal. It was a complete blow and such devastating news,
especially when we were just expecting to find out the baby's
gender. Sure we wanted to know if the baby was healthy, but that was
at the back of our minds since we had three healthy babies.
following day, we saw a specialist and based on the abnormalities,
he suspected our baby girl, who we have named Angel, has Trisomy 13.
We did an amnio that day and the results confirmed the doctor's
initial diagnosis, further proving that our Little Angel has full
Trisomy 13 (proboscis, polydactyly, brain, kidney and heart
defects). Since then, I have been seeing the high-risk OB doctors at
Wilford Hall at Lackland Air Force Base every two weeks. They have
been wonderful and very supportive in every decision we make.
It has been quite an emotional roller coaster ride for all of us.
But, we are embracing and enjoying every minute we have with our
We have had multiple ultrasounds to capture precious
moments. We also had a 15 minute video recording of one ultrasound
session that shows her smiling, sucking her thumb, puckering her
lips, stretching, and grabbing hold of one her foot! I am excited to
meet her, but at the same time, I wish I can keep her inside me
where I know she is safe and thriving.
I am currently scheduled for
an induction on November 30th. I know that day will be bittersweet.
I hope we have some time with her before she returns to heaven. All
I know now is that we have been blessed to have her in our lives.